Another coach in my community recently posted something on FB that really got me thinking. She was taking some time off for vacation, and trying to find peace in allowing herself to just relax and read a book indoors all day, rather than spending her time outside being active.
For her whole life she had directly and indirectly, received the message that spending time outdoors was morally superior to “being lazy” and reading inside. She was questioning all of it. Is it morally superior to be outside? She posed the question to the rest of us, “What else do we falsely believe is morally superior?” I was fascinated reading this thread because of all of the ideas that were offered. Here are just a few!
It is morally superior to read self help books vs fiction.
It’s morally superior to drink water vs soda.
It’s morally superior to be a vegetarian.
It’s morally superior to spend free time giving service instead of relaxing.
A clean home is morally superior to a messy one.
A thin body is morally superior to a heavy one.
Being busy is morally superior to relaxing.
Reading is morally superior to watching TV.
Waking early in the morning is morally superior to being a night owl.
Cooking your own food is morally superior to eating out.
Being an extrovert is morally superior to being an introvert.
Being early is morally superior to being late.
Saving money is morally superior to spending.
Tolerating pain is morally superior to taking pain meds.
Using your turn signal is morally superior.
It’s morally superior to NOT order dessert.
And my personal favorite:
Going to church is morally superior to those who don’t.
And on and on and on….
What do you believe is morally superior? This is such a great question for all of us to consider. Whether we want to admit it or not, we all have beliefs along this line of thinking.
It doesn’t mean we’re all just jerks. Remember, our lower brains are wired to seek inclusion, so we want other people to think well of us, -we crave their approval!
But wow, what an opportunity for all of us to examine our beliefs and become better people, when we can recognize that all our judgments are just that.
They are flawed beliefs we hold onto in order to self-promote.
If drinking water makes us feel healthy, drink it and enjoy! But it doesn’t make us better or more worthy people than those who choose to drink a soda.
If going to church allows us to feel closer to God and increases our faith, fantastic! But thinking for one moment that we are better than other people because we do so, is evidence in itself, that we’re not.
This past week I’ve been battling myself a bit, forcing myself to enjoy taking a break. My brain believes that working hard and being productive is morally superior to taking a break or “wasting” time.
But OH HOW I NEEDED IT!
And I’m still me.
Still just as worthy of love. Still as smart and capable and deserving as I am when I work hard.
As long as we allow our flawed perceptions to shape our lives, we limit our growth.
I would challenge you to take a look at your own beliefs this week. What things in your life do you believe make you morally superior?
Be honest with yourself.
If you can identify those thoughts, you’ll come face to face with yourself, discover the truth, and evolve to the next best level of you.
And the best byproduct of it is that you’ll grow to love and accept everyone around you more unconditionally.
And that, my friends, is the key to having really happy days.