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The Excruciation of Stagnation

I love being a mom.  It has been and always will be my favorite job in the world, but after we had our third baby and I was home all day long with the kids, I found myself in a real funk.  We didn’t have a lot of money to go do things and where I had chosen to quit working to stay home with the babies, I became a little depressed looking at the same four walls most of the time.

I ACHED for change.  I would park the kids in front of Barney on TV and read novels… (this was pre-Netflix so no escaping there!) I would dive into stories of other women’s lives, living vicariously through their growth and their ups and downs.  My brain craved stimulation and I wasn’t getting it by feeding kids and changing diapers.

That stagnant space, that lack of growth felt suffocating.

I wanted conversation, I wanted to learn new things and have new experiences.  The pain of not growing in some way felt completely intolerable to me.

We all encounter discomfort, but we get to choose the discomfort we will experience.

You can choose the discomfort of being overweight and feeling uncomfortable in your clothes, OR you can choose the discomfort of denying yourself processed sugar and flour and choosing to exercise.

You can choose the discomfort of hating your boring job, OR you can choose the discomfort of pushing yourself to gain the skills required for the one you would love.

You can choose the discomfort of living in a messy house OR you can choose the discomfort of cleaning up the mess, or paying someone else to do it for you.

You can choose the discomfort of suffering in your marriage, OR you can choose the discomfort of going to work to make it better.

I will always choose the discomfort of growth, -over money, over comfort, over security… just about anything.  

Staying the same, year after year, feels to me to be the very definition of hell.

The type of discomfort we choose determines the results we will experience, so if we’re going to be uncomfortable anyway, doesn’t it make sense to choose the discomfort that creates something incredible for ourselves?

Have you asked yourself what you really want?

Have you explored your desires and shut them down, or do you give them the attention and respect that they deserve as the voice of your higher being calling to you?

Nothing is impossible.  Our ability to create is a God-given trait and everyone has it.  But it’s up to us to decide to use it.

I invite you to consider the type of discomfort you want to choose.

If looking ahead makes you dread the future with your spouse, are you willing to get uncomfortable to change that?  If not, why?

The work of growth might be uncomfortable, but it’s a beautiful process that makes your life SO MUCH MORE.


When you’re ready to experience the discomfort of creating the marriage you want, I’m here for you.  I’ve walked that path, I know the steps and I’ll take you by the hand and show you the way.